私の平和を保つ

It's ironic that here is where I ended up after all this time. I managed to find my original posts from when I first started blogging online. I had to dig through the html that had somehow gotten into my files, but I picked it out. I'm so different from then. It's strange looking back and seeing the ignorance in my words, seeing how I was grasping at anything and then releasing into a pool of absolutely nothing. I was helpless and alone and going slowly insane. Now I feel trapped, it's honestly similar to how I felt then except now there is a fear of expressing what I do feel. That and I don't have that same ignorance I had before. It was somewhat of a security. A security I'm still somewhat caught in. I'm still ignorant, in a way. I think I need to start talking to more people. If I don't expand soon I'll probably always be trapped in this security and haze.